I LOVE BABIES, I HATE that whenever I see them I cant even go close to them. Will I ever be able to look at a newborn and not get knots in my stomach or tears in my eyes? Thank you Lord for the miracle of Grayden!
God knows me and He knows my heart....He orchestrates EVERYTHING in my life. Let me not be in the way of His working. There is a purpose in everything, yes, even suffering pain and trial.
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." Jn 15:5
I am a vessel. Therefore, He WILL work through me...let me make sure I am keeping my eyes fixed upon Him so that He will get the Glory. Not my will, but His be done. I will continue to practice the art of casting my cares and burdens upon Him.
"Cast all your anxiety on him because He (alone) cares for you." 1 Pet 5:7
Worrying does nothing productive, it doesnt change tomorrow....if anything it makes things worse.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matt 6
"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." Rom 8:18
"To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps." 1 Pet 2:21
Psalm 68:19-20 "Praise the Lord, who carries our burdens day after day; He is the God who saves us. Our God is a God who saves; He is the Lord, our Lord, who rescues us from death.: 69:13 "But as for me, I will pray to you, Lord; answer me, God, at a time you choose. Answer me because of your great Love, because you keep your promise to save."
Medical situation---still a whole lot of confusion. : / Thankful the Lord knows what is going on, even when we dont :).
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Saturday, August 6, 2011
SUPER EASY AND WONDERFULLY CHEAP
For those of you who know me well, you know I really enjoy baking and cooking. One of my favorite things is making as much from scratch as I can. I'm sharing with you the recipe for homemade vanilla extract. Ok, so here's the procedure:
1. Buy 10 vanilla beans off amazon.com (I use Tahitian Beanilla Vanilla beans) $8.50 + $2.44 shipping
2. Buy a bottle of Vodka that is a dark color (I use Skyy Vodka--its dark blue). Local Liquarium for $13.99
3. Slice the vanilla beans in half and open them a bit, put in vodka (you can also use burbon). Close the bottle.
4. Let it sit in a cool dark place for 4 1/2 months. The longer it sits the better it gets!
I originally got this recipe from http://www.lynnskitchenadventures.com. :o)
I prefer to make my own extract because the process of expelling the vanilla flavor out of the bean is NOT natural. Not to mention, homemade is MUCH tastier (AND CHEAPER)! P.S. If you make it now so it'll be ready for Christmas baking :o)
1. Buy 10 vanilla beans off amazon.com (I use Tahitian Beanilla Vanilla beans) $8.50 + $2.44 shipping
2. Buy a bottle of Vodka that is a dark color (I use Skyy Vodka--its dark blue). Local Liquarium for $13.99
3. Slice the vanilla beans in half and open them a bit, put in vodka (you can also use burbon). Close the bottle.
4. Let it sit in a cool dark place for 4 1/2 months. The longer it sits the better it gets!
I originally got this recipe from http://www.lynnskitchenadventures.com. :o)
I prefer to make my own extract because the process of expelling the vanilla flavor out of the bean is NOT natural. Not to mention, homemade is MUCH tastier (AND CHEAPER)! P.S. If you make it now so it'll be ready for Christmas baking :o)
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
I bet your wondering why the long silence???
Yes???? So sorry my friends. I have been super busy and not feeling so great. I do have some good news though! I have finally been diagnosed with something that has been causing all the madness in my life. Apparently whats been causing me to lose our babies, pass out, dizzy, confusions, migraines, extreme fatigue, etc is a disease called "Hughes" or "Antiphospholipid Syndrome." Hubby and I are floored that ALL the answers we've been looking for are from this disease. As heartbroken as we are that all the symptoms were there but they were overlooked, we also know that the Lord is sovereign over ALL things.
Good news: with treatment (although I would have to inject myself with heparin every day, EEK needles!) in pregnancy the babies are 80% likely to survive.
Sad news: without treatment that babies only have a 20% chance of survival...as we've seen those odds aren't great for us. Beautiful news: Grayden is even more of a miracle baby than we thought :D. Also, this is deadly to me (w/o treatment), despite my TIAs, the Lord decided to keep me here! I should clarify----I told the dr about some of the symptoms i've had on 2 different occasions and he said that it sounds like a TIA...which cannot actually be confirmed until I get an MRI (and I have no idea when that is). :)
We plan on meeting to talk with the Dr about planning for future children when all my blood work is in. Lord willing. This requires much prayer as I am not sure that I am even willing to get pregnant after everything....pregnancy is really really hard for me and the losses just add to it.
On another note....we are getting our home ready for a foster care home inspection, possible foster to adopt? :). What a beautiful way to love a child and show them the love of Christ. What better way than take in a little one who needs a place to call home?! We are SUPER excited about this step...even though we are still finding out what is going on with my own health. Anywho, thought I would send on an update :). Blessings to all!
Good news: with treatment (although I would have to inject myself with heparin every day, EEK needles!) in pregnancy the babies are 80% likely to survive.
Sad news: without treatment that babies only have a 20% chance of survival...as we've seen those odds aren't great for us. Beautiful news: Grayden is even more of a miracle baby than we thought :D. Also, this is deadly to me (w/o treatment), despite my TIAs, the Lord decided to keep me here! I should clarify----I told the dr about some of the symptoms i've had on 2 different occasions and he said that it sounds like a TIA...which cannot actually be confirmed until I get an MRI (and I have no idea when that is). :)
We plan on meeting to talk with the Dr about planning for future children when all my blood work is in. Lord willing. This requires much prayer as I am not sure that I am even willing to get pregnant after everything....pregnancy is really really hard for me and the losses just add to it.
On another note....we are getting our home ready for a foster care home inspection, possible foster to adopt? :). What a beautiful way to love a child and show them the love of Christ. What better way than take in a little one who needs a place to call home?! We are SUPER excited about this step...even though we are still finding out what is going on with my own health. Anywho, thought I would send on an update :). Blessings to all!
I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength. Phl 4:13
Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalm 25:4-5
And the Lord shall guide you continually and satisfy you in drought and in dry places and make strong your bones. And you shall be like a watered garden and like a spring of water whose waters fail not. Isaiah 58:11
From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. Psalm 61:2-3
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Delay...but the good kind
Drs, unpacking, packing, VBS, getting ready for yard sale...OH MY! Ok, so the NANC thing is going to have to be put on hold for a while. I've barely been able to catch my breath I've been so busy. This week I'm unpacking from our trip to see the in-laws, packing to visit my family....ANNNNNNNNND getting ready for our yard sale this weekend! I wouldnt be so excited but this is a SPECIAL yard sale :). We are officially starting to save for adoption. We will have a sign that says "all sales proceeds go to saving for adopting an orphan." What do you think? Is it cheesy?
Hm...I think I missed a chapter in here?! :) So last week I went to the Drs and they found that I have poor liver function, which has caused high cholesterol. They are thinking (although again there is no testing now that I'm not preggers) that the high cholesterol led to high blood pressure, and that to pre-eclampsia (they had thought that before). I certainly had all the symptoms of it, I wish they would have known something sooner so SOMETHING could have been done. I still just think of my sweet babies, and what they had to go through :..(. ANYWAY, so unless there is some earth-breaking discovery w/ the Drs we are NOT ok with being pregnant again. I am switching specialists to a Dr that comes HIGHLY recommended by one of my friends who has been in the OB/GYN community for a while. She tells me if anyone can get to the bottom of these losses, its him :). I'll keep you updated on that as I know more. Its quite grieving to me and scary. However, I'm also excited because I feel like I have something to aim for. We are praying for the direction, but for now we are thinking International adoption.
There are so many children in this world that need love, and unless someone adopts them---wont have parents. We would be honored to be a parents to a few (?) of those children. So hear lies a new journey. Ack...here comes the tears. I'm scared, I'm relieved, I'm nervous, and I'm quite excited to see where the Lord leads us! :) I gotta stop writing before the water works take over. :)
Love to all!
Hm...I think I missed a chapter in here?! :) So last week I went to the Drs and they found that I have poor liver function, which has caused high cholesterol. They are thinking (although again there is no testing now that I'm not preggers) that the high cholesterol led to high blood pressure, and that to pre-eclampsia (they had thought that before). I certainly had all the symptoms of it, I wish they would have known something sooner so SOMETHING could have been done. I still just think of my sweet babies, and what they had to go through :..(. ANYWAY, so unless there is some earth-breaking discovery w/ the Drs we are NOT ok with being pregnant again. I am switching specialists to a Dr that comes HIGHLY recommended by one of my friends who has been in the OB/GYN community for a while. She tells me if anyone can get to the bottom of these losses, its him :). I'll keep you updated on that as I know more. Its quite grieving to me and scary. However, I'm also excited because I feel like I have something to aim for. We are praying for the direction, but for now we are thinking International adoption.
There are so many children in this world that need love, and unless someone adopts them---wont have parents. We would be honored to be a parents to a few (?) of those children. So hear lies a new journey. Ack...here comes the tears. I'm scared, I'm relieved, I'm nervous, and I'm quite excited to see where the Lord leads us! :) I gotta stop writing before the water works take over. :)
Love to all!
Monday, June 20, 2011
AGH where has this time gone?!
Are you constantly reminded of how fast time flies?! WOW I AM!
Agh...I FULLY intend on writing every week. The week I wrote that WAS NOT the week to say that I'd be writing weekly. I was at my inlaws for 10 days and they have a dinosaur with dial up connection!!! Needless to say, one cannot think as slow as that computer allows me to type.
This week....I'm working in VBS. I'm completely sold out for ministry this week!! What a beautiful and wonderful thing to be exhausted from (and today was only the first day!)
I've thought of blogging for my NANC info since I posted about it, I WILL get around to it one morning this week :0).
Blessings dear friends and family!
Agh...I FULLY intend on writing every week. The week I wrote that WAS NOT the week to say that I'd be writing weekly. I was at my inlaws for 10 days and they have a dinosaur with dial up connection!!! Needless to say, one cannot think as slow as that computer allows me to type.
This week....I'm working in VBS. I'm completely sold out for ministry this week!! What a beautiful and wonderful thing to be exhausted from (and today was only the first day!)
I've thought of blogging for my NANC info since I posted about it, I WILL get around to it one morning this week :0).
Blessings dear friends and family!
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Parenting...getting at the heart of the issue.
As I shared with you before, we are considering adoption. We picked up a small book put out by CCEF (Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation) called "Helping Your Adopted Child: Understanding Your Child's Unique Identity"...there was a lot of great information in it, I suggest it if anyone is thinking of adoption. :0) Anyway, the point of my post....I've been using some information from the book with little Gray and it seems to help A LOT at figuring out his motives.
"Questions that aim at the heart:
1. What was going on? Have your child tell you about the details of the situation.
2. What were you thinking and feeling as it was happening? This will help your child look at the thoughts and emotions in her heart.
3. What did you do in response? It's important that you ask this third and not second, because your child's behavior comes from her heart.
4. Why did you do it; what were you seeking to accomplish? This goes after the purposes, goals, and motives of the heart.
5. What was the result? This addresses the consequences of the choices the child made."
Discipline and encourage appropriately...edify with scriptures and have your little one pray (or help them to) :).
"Questions that aim at the heart:
1. What was going on? Have your child tell you about the details of the situation.
2. What were you thinking and feeling as it was happening? This will help your child look at the thoughts and emotions in her heart.
3. What did you do in response? It's important that you ask this third and not second, because your child's behavior comes from her heart.
4. Why did you do it; what were you seeking to accomplish? This goes after the purposes, goals, and motives of the heart.
5. What was the result? This addresses the consequences of the choices the child made."
Discipline and encourage appropriately...edify with scriptures and have your little one pray (or help them to) :).
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Would you like to take a journey with me?
"Lets start at the very beginning...a very good place to start" (can you hear me singing?)
I have been going to training for biblical counseling (NANC-National Association of Nouthetic Counselors)...it has been absolutely wonderful! If there is something that I desire to do full time after my children are grown, THIS IS IT! In our training we found there was so much information that it was hard to take in. What I plan to do is to go through the information we've been learning at a slower pace and share what I've learned with YOU! :) Would you like that?
Maybe I should tell you more about NANC? Well let me tell you, I was sold on it right away! If you would like the details the website is http://www.nanc.org/ . To sum it up, its an organization that trains counselors to treat counselees using the Word of God to work at a heart level. After all, the ONLY thing that can truly change us is---- if our hearts change first through the power and love of Christ. Praise be to our God through Jesus Christ that we are no longer slaves to sin, but we have power over it!! The BIBLE (Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth--as my hubby calls it) is the material that is used for all the counseling.
My goal is to write at LEAST once a week...we will be going through scriptures for different life circumstances: Marriage, Parenting, Depression/Worry, Addictions, and many more!!! I will try to give you personal application and I would love to have feedback from you on the material and how the Lord has used it to touch your life (to bless others reading as well). If not, thats perfectly fine too :). I will be praying for all of our hearts as we start on this journey together!
BLESSINGS!!!
I have been going to training for biblical counseling (NANC-National Association of Nouthetic Counselors)...it has been absolutely wonderful! If there is something that I desire to do full time after my children are grown, THIS IS IT! In our training we found there was so much information that it was hard to take in. What I plan to do is to go through the information we've been learning at a slower pace and share what I've learned with YOU! :) Would you like that?
Maybe I should tell you more about NANC? Well let me tell you, I was sold on it right away! If you would like the details the website is http://www.nanc.org/ . To sum it up, its an organization that trains counselors to treat counselees using the Word of God to work at a heart level. After all, the ONLY thing that can truly change us is---- if our hearts change first through the power and love of Christ. Praise be to our God through Jesus Christ that we are no longer slaves to sin, but we have power over it!! The BIBLE (Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth--as my hubby calls it) is the material that is used for all the counseling.
My goal is to write at LEAST once a week...we will be going through scriptures for different life circumstances: Marriage, Parenting, Depression/Worry, Addictions, and many more!!! I will try to give you personal application and I would love to have feedback from you on the material and how the Lord has used it to touch your life (to bless others reading as well). If not, thats perfectly fine too :). I will be praying for all of our hearts as we start on this journey together!
BLESSINGS!!!
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